dijous, 12 de juliol de 2007

Novel·la (I)

Fa un any vaig escriure una novel·leta de seixanta pàgines. La intenció era fer-la entrar en un concurs de narrativa breu, al qual s'havien de presentar obres de seixanta a setanta pàgines. Com que a mi, dels concursos, l'únic que m'interessa són els premis, és a dir, els diners, vaig escriure exactament seixanta pàgines, que era la condició mínima per a guanyar el premi. L'obra no va guanyar i ara, abans que no es cremi l'ordinador o hi entri algun virus enviat per algun dels meus detractors, la publico aquí.

Faré com al segle XIX: per petits lliuraments de cinc pàgines. Així, quan aneu a comprar el diari -és a dir, quan us connecteu aquí- trobareu durant uns dies la meva secció literària. Així, també, mantindrem una mica el "suspense" o enjòlit: a veure com acabaran els embolics imaginats per una ment nocturna com la meva. Per cert: ara mateix ja no recordo quin títol li vaig posar, a aquesta novel·leta. Tant se val: en tot cas, espero que us ho passeu bé llegint-la.

El divendres dia 23 de març d’aquell any, a les deu de la nit, Pere Rius i Font, que en tenia seixanta-set, va anar a llançar al contenidor de vidre, que hi havia tot just dos carrers més amunt del seu, cinc ampolles de cava, que havia trigat mesos a consumir perquè, d’una banda, era abstemi i, de l’altra, no tenia gaire vida social i, per tant, tampoc no li vagava gaire d’oferir a visites una o dues copes d’aquella beguda, fent passar per gentilesa allò que, en realitat, li constituïa sens dubte un alleugeriment.

Pere Rius i Font era una persona sòbria, d’una rectitud moral inqüestionable, almenys en allò que deixava veure d’ell mateix –qui podria, en efecte, escorcollar l’interior de les persones, furgar en els seus sentiments, arribar a tocar amb la ment el més profund de cada existència concreta? – i complia al peu de la lletra els seus deures de ciutadania, conscient que per a poquíssims era amic, per a uns quants més, familiar i, per a tota la resta, per a tota la resta de la humanitat, ciutadà.

Entre els deures que ell considerava que li pertocaven com a ciutadà, sobretot des que un dia va llegir un fulletó que va rebre de l’ajuntament que, en realitat, anava adreçat a la veïna del quart –però, és clar, la veïna ja feia dos anys que havia anat a viure a Barcelona, i bé l’havia d’obrir algú, aquella carta, i més quan es veia clarament que era de propaganda– i que, aquest fulletó, explicava què podíem fer els ciutadans, la comunitat, tots nosaltres per a salvar el planeta, greument malmès per comportaments incívics, doncs entre aquests deures hi havia en un dels llocs més destacats anar cada dia als contenidors i abocar-hi tot el que havia generat l’economia de cadascú (que, en el seu cas, era modesta): les restes orgàniques, al contenidor petit; el paper, al contenidor blau, més gros, que hi havia al costat; i als contenidors més forts i robustos, el vidre i les bosses d’escombraries, aquestes, és clar, sempre a partir de les deu, ja que altrament una tapa oberta podia deixar anar pudors desagradables que, sobretot a l’estiu, s’originaven espontàniament per la fermentació dels productes que s’hi havia anat abocant, de distinta naturalesa, i molt variada.

En arribar, doncs, Pere Rius i Font, davant del contenidor de vidre –aquell dia era tan escassa la producció de paper i tan minsa la de brossa d’altra mena, que havia decidit de, ficant-la en dues bossetes, deixar-la créixer i, un cop més generosa, abocar-la al contenidor– es trobà que, per manca de personal de l’ajuntament, o per deixadesa dels veïns, que no havien trucat al Servei de Recollida d’Escombraries perquè passés a buscar-les o potser, fins i tot, per una acumulació sobtada de brossa, que de tant en tant es produïa, essent imprevisible de saber el que abocaria cada dia al contenidor un nombre indeterminat d’habitants, el contenidor estava ple a vessar. Curull, atapeït, saturat: no hi cabia ni una ampolla més i, encara, de les que hi havia, ben bé una desena corria el perill de, sobreeixint massa de la boca, caure al terra, i fer-hi una trencadissa.

I en Pere Rius i Font, que era una persona metòdica, meditativa, enraonada i assenyada, s’aturà uns instants davant d’aquell contenidor pensant què era el millor per a ell i, sobretot, per a la comunitat, de fer amb aquella bossa i, sobretot, amb les cinc ampolles de cava buides que contenia i que, amb un nas fi, encara flairaven de xampany.

I s’esdevenia que, si s’emportava la bossa altre cop a casa seva, podia trobar algun veí que, veient-lo anar amunt i avall amb bosses plenes d’ampolles, pensés que Pere Rius i Font, aquell home tan assenyat i correcte, no fos en realitat un traficant de begudes o un alcohòlic que, en la solitud i sordidesa en què, forçosament, havia de passar moltes nits, bevia cava en desmesura, intentant d’aquesta manera tapar amb una festa aparent allò que, en realitat, era una buidor existencial que caldria qualificar de dissort.

En canvi, si deixava les ampolles allí, què passaria? Fins a quin punt era ell responsable del fet que els contenidors estiguessin atapeïts? Deixar ampolles al costat del contenidor, ni que fos ben arrenglerades i procurant d’ocupar el menor espai possible, constituïa per als empleats municipals que, a mitjanit, les haurien de recollir, una tasca que, moralment, se’ls pogués demanar d’assumir? Fins on arribaven els límits de la correcta ciutadania i, en aquest cas, quina era l’actitud que s’havia d’esperar d’una persona com ell?

I, mentre pensava tot això, succeí que un veí dels rodals se li atansà amb un gos de grans dimensions que, en aquella hora de la nit, havia tret a passejar. El gos, veient aquell home desconegut, que dubtava sobre si havia de deixar o no a la vora del contenidor aquelles ampolles fressejants, es va posar a bordar, sentint-se aguts i poderosos els seus lladrucs, amplificats per la foscor, per la solitud i, en l’esperit de Pere Rius i Font, per la por sobtada que li produïa aquell atansament inesperat, aquell atac sonor que podia amb tota probabilitat esdevenir físic i agressiu en qualsevol moment. De manera que Pere Rius i Font, empès per les circumstàncies, i viciada la seva voluntat per la presència d’aquell element intimidatori, va decidir decantar-se per l’opció, meditada com a possibilitat des de feia estona, de deixar les ampolles allí, als contenidors, i no pas endur-se-les; i sentia els lladrucs i els gemecs del gos mentre accelerava el pas cap a casa seva, on havia d’estar protegit dels perills i les eventualitats de la nit i el desemparament.

S’esdevingué que aquell dia, que era senar, el Servei de Recollida d’Escombraries no passà pel carrer en què Pere Rius i Font havia deixat les ampolles i on, més tard, el gos del veí havia bordat tan agressivament i amb escàndol. De manera que aquells utensilis quedaren a la serena, lleugerament acaronats per la fresqueta del vent que, en una nit estelada de primavera, encara deixava sentir una presència constant.

I així s’estigueren les ampolles, vagament arrenglerades, fins que, a les cinc del matí, passà vora el contenidor una colla de cinc joves que, per l’edat, hom hauria dit que feien els estudis secundaris; per la indumentària, que assumien en la societat un paper clarament transgressor i, per la cridòria, que estaven en la plenitud de la seva vigoria, i en volien fer ús, escampant amb el seu escàndol molest la intensitat de la vida, encara poc domesticada per la convivència i, talment un riu desbordat després d’unes tempestes abundoses, desitjós de sortir de mare i, amb una llibertat i una força naturals i primigènies, envair espais i àmbits, en un cant desfermat de joventut.

I mentre dos dels nois cantaven i dos més proferien renecs adreçats, versemblantment, contra aquell que, en hores avançades de la matinada, pogués estar dormint i, per aquest motiu, fos indubtablement més vulnerable a les molèsties acústiques, l’altre, el cinquè, s’adonà de la presència de les ampolles i, amb un crit, manà als seus companys de callar, deixant de banda les ocupacions a què cadascú es dedicava i, tot seguit, de fixar-se en aquells objectes de vidre, de boca grossa, i de pensar en la finalitat que, en una nit de gresca, podrien tenir.

Fou llavors que, sense pensar-s’ho gaire, els nois tingueren la idea, suggerida en primer lloc pel que havia detectat la presència de les ampolles, però elaborada tot seguit, i perfeccionada, pels comentaris de tots plegats, d’omplir els recipients amb l’orina que cadascú pogués abocar-hi, fent d’aquesta manera una competició sobre qui en tenia més i, doncs, segons els seus càlculs –probablement no científics, però viscuts per ells, en tot cas, com a tals– sobre qui havia begut més alcohol durant les hores de la nit que havien precedit aquella troballa, i que havien de precedir encara altres hores nocturnes d’aquell cap de setmana que ara tot just s’encetava.

De manera que, entre rialles desfermades, greuges comparatius relatius a la grandària de l’estri amb què cadascú duia a terme la tasca pautada, cridòries diverses que no evitaven algun insult i que es referien, essencialment, al grau de masculinitat de cadascú, o a la manera com estaven duent a terme aquella obra, massa lenta, pel que sembla, en alguns casos, els nois s’alliberaren de l’angúnia que provoca tenir al cos més líquid que no es necessita, i no poder-se’n desfer.

Fou llavors que el noi que ja abans havia tingut la idea de dur a terme la competició i que ara, en formular una altra proposta, es perfilava inequívocament com el de més iniciativa, ni que fos en un àmbit que molts no haurien dubtat de classificar dins del camp de la disbauxa i el llibertinatge, indicà als altres que, amb aquelles ampolles plenes, i aprofitant els cordills que sobresortien del contenidor col·lateral, podien anar al parc i, penjant-les de les branques d’un arbre, detectar amb la manera com es vinclaven la força de cadascú, decorant d’aquella manera el bé comú que constituïen els arbres d’un parc amb les seves excrescències més primitives, en una mena de deliri col·lectiu que, ajudat per l’alcohol, deixava el camí lliure a les forces més profundes i, a la vegada, més sinceres, de la natura.

Adreçant-se, doncs, al parc de la Font de Ferro, els cinc nois, proveïts amb sengles ampolles, que contenien les produccions líquides de cadascú, hi detectaren un arbre, lleugerament arrecerat del pas dels visitants del parc, i hi penjaren les ampolles entre riotes i befes de natura diversa. Després, cansats per la nit i per les activitats que hi havia dut a terme, s’adreçaren cadascú a casa seva, on, en algun cas, foren rebuts per uns pares que esmorzaven o es deixondien per al nou dia que, tot i ser festiu, començava per a molts igualment a les set o a les vuit del matí, per la força del costum, que moldeja els cossos.

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